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commented on Feb. 13, 2011
It’s that romantic time of year again. Prepare to get inundated with ‘the true meaning of love’ (from the folks selling chocolate, flowers, jewelry and or lingerie). As a holistic interior designer I take a different approach and ask ‘what kind of relationship are you having with your home?’ Just like true love, we know that home is much more than just a physical connection. I believe if we treat our home as we treat our sweetest lover, we experience a deeper connection to our dwellings, and ultimately, ourselves.
Is your bedroom conducive to romance? I often witness this room, sadly, as the least sexy of spaces. Since it is our private space it often gets neglected and becomes a storage bin for clothes and you-name it-clutter. Ideally, your bedroom should be for sleep and sex (and why I am not a fan of TV in the bedroom as it disrupts both activities). It is best decorated simply with soothing colors and patterns to help induce a restful calm state. Create harmony and balance with symmetry, pairing items such as night tables, lighting on each side of the bed and equal access to both sides of the bed. This encourages a more intimate equal relationship. As difficult as it is in a small space, do not let junk (or dirt) accumulate under the bed as it can disrupt your sleep (or chi in feng shui speak). Always use natural non-synthetic bedding, pillows, and fabrics (everywhere in your home). Complete darkness is vital for getting proper sleep and even a clock light can be disruptive. The right room temperature (cool), and good air circulation is also critical.
The most important element of all is intention. Any time you make changes to your personal space (both in your home and yourself), visualize and welcome in a deeper love. Sharing a space also includes vulnerability, letting your guard down to be completely naked and knowing that you are loved in spite of your imperfections. That wonderful feeling of acceptance of our well-worn habits is akin to wabi sabi – which translates into an aesthetic as beauty that is "imperfect, impermanent and incomplete”, Wabi-sabi nurtures all that is authentic by acknowledging three simple realities: nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect. That antique sideboard with all of the signs of usage or the chair that has different paint colors peeling off in just the right way and gives us instant comfort…just like your perfect love.
All we need to do is to take a different perspective, one filled with kindness, to discover the soul of a house, and ultimately our own soul.
Embrace Your Space, Happy Valentines Day!
Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell." - Joan Crawford